Pregnancy Weight

With my last pregnancy, I gained fifty pounds (maybe even 55 if you'd weighed me on the day I had him). I never in a million years expected to gain so much! I thought for sure I would have one of those "cute" pregnant bellies and gain around 25 or 30 at the most. My mother had gained only 25 pounds with each of her babies and I just expected I would do the same.

It was so hard to be carrying around that much weight by the end of the pregnancy. I felt huge. Like a monster that made the earth rumble under my feet with each step--pound, pound, pound. And waddle, waddle, waddle, of course.

Going into this for the second time, I have to admit that's the thing I'm really not looking forward to. Feeling huge, having trouble getting around, barely being able to walk. It's the worst part of pregnancy in my book! Especially since this baby will be due in the heat of summer.

I keep wondering if there's any way I could gain less this time, and if it would be healthy to do so? Am I just one of those people who needs to gain a ton of weight to be able to carry a healthy baby? Did I overeat? I put no limit on my intake of food, as midwives and doctor's generally advise against it today unless you have a condition like gestational diabetes. I ate almost entirely healthy, made from scratch meals. But I ate SO much of everything. Especially in the last two months.

I have been lucky in that breastfeeding allowed me to shed all of my pregnancy weight by four months postpartum. So at least I am going into the second pregnancy without extra weight from the first. However, this time, I hope to watch the quantity of what I eat and really ask myself if I "need" to eat more, or am just eating from boredom. It may not make a difference in what I gain.....

But it would be so nice to only gain 25 pounds and still feel somewhat agile! Especially since I will have another little person to chase after this time!

The Unexpected

It's a windy and cold day here, and there is a lot that my brain is processing.

The last two weeks have been very eventful. There has been a lot of bad news. Our only car was in a car accident and is out of commission. A family member suffered a heart attack. Other family members are having problems with their jobs. A friend broke up with her fiance and their engagement is over. In the midst of all this, I had a teething baby that was clingy and whiny. To top it off, this is my husband's busy season for work and he is away on business almost every week.

When he finally did make it home to us for the weekend, he was sick and the weekend we had hoped to enjoy together was instead full of tissues, coughing, and a fever.

In the midst of all this, we learned something surprising: we are pregnant with baby number two. Wow. With our first only 7 months old, you can bet I was surprised starring at that positive pregnancy test. So many things ran through my mind. People will think we are crazy. How will I manage two under two?

But despite the little fears that creep in, I know deep in my soul that this is good. And that this is right. I could never know when to "plan" the next child for us. There are too many things to consider and I'd get overwhelmed. But God knows. And His timing is perfect, so we can rest assured that this is the perfect time for this child to come to us.

So we thank Him and look forward to who this child will be and what they will add to our family.

Now that I already have one, I look forward even more to what they will be like--their personality, their hair color, their face. I look forward to meeting them for the first time...that precious moment that can never be forgotten. Their little newborn cry. There is so much to look forward to!

And for every thought that whispers, "what if" and "how will you..." there is the strength and peace of God that envelopes me and reassures me that He will give me what I need each day at a time.